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| Green Lights - minus their captain Peter Coath - assembled at Hitchin at 10am sharp for their opening fixture against Dulwich Hamlet in the supporter's non league equivient of the F.A. Cup. The squad consisted of twelve players who were picked at random by Enfield's Paul Moran at a date prior to the event. Green Lights' selection policy is that everyone gets a game if they have paid towards costs, and with more than twenty players to choose from, Clive felt this random selection to be the fairest way to resolve who would be out on the pitch. Green Lights were playing under the name of Enfield, and playing in red & green I guess the Lights must have felt that they WERE Enfield for a day. |  Dave Bromage (above) in action at Hitchin. |
12 teams, split into 4 groups of 3
8-a-side. 8 minutes per half.
Winners of each of the 4 groups to contest semi-finals proper. The remaining 8 teams to contest for the Wooden Spoon Final.
Tied groups to be decided on goal difference, or goals scored/disciplinary record/sudden death penalties.
| A | B | C | D |
|---|---|---|---|
| Bishop's Stortford | Exeter City | Aylesbury | |
| Hertford Town | Chelmsford | Hitchin Town (B) | Dulwich Hamlet (B) |
| Sutton United (A) | Hitchin Town (A) | Sutton United (A) | ENFIELD |
This was a well-organised tournament. A matchday programme, with full pen pics of each of the teams involved in the days events; a snack bar that was open throughout the day; the social club, likewise. Enfield made themselves comfortable in the main stand next to Dulwich Hamlet's sides on the right, with Sutton's teams to the left. How long would it be before a little friendly banter began? The Chelmsford side were late to arrive, but their games were completed before the knockout stages began
Enfield opened up their Hitchin 97 campaign with a fixture against Dulwich Hamlet B. A loss by either side would mean the difference between going for a cup, or slumming it with the wooden spoon brigade. Unfortunately for Enfield, it would be the latter, but not before the tannoy announcer raised a laugh with his "Dave Broomage" pronounciation. The only goal of the game came from a move down the Dulwich right, and from the resulting cross came the winner from - some geezer whose name escapes me - a header that beat Lee Mills all ends up. Both Dulwich Hamlet's sides were marshalled by the larger-than-life-size Mishi, and it was the self-appointed Dulwich cheerleader who came in for some stick later on in the day when he ran onto the pitch to organise penalty-kick tactics, bringing forth a quip from the tannoy announcer of 'get off - the pitch has been rolled already!!'.
Last season Aylesbury played a ringer. Not this year, and it showed! True - they had a tricky little blond lad that made a few mazy runs, but the rest of the side did little to trouble the Enfield defence.
Up to this point Enfield had yet to test the opposition goalie; Dave Bromage was having a nightmare and was pulled off at half-time to be replaced by the even more ineffectual John Taverner, who did little to endear himself after his refereeing *performance* against the Fat Boys. John had sent off Chris the Bannerman for contesting a foul throw in that match, and here he was, doing the same thing as well! The significance of the event did not go unnoticed by Bannerman, and when the play moved over to standside he let out a barrage of abuse in John's direction. At one point during the game an Enfield attacker was contesting a decision, and John rushed over to explain that 'the referee is always right'. Oh, sure. The final whistle blew to the news that Enfield would be contesting the wooden spoon against our good friends from Sutton B.
This was the third of the group games. I only mention it because the match was being played after the Enfield side returned from a stint in the social club. When our all-time top scorer (Mr. Bromage) loses to the manager's twelve-year-old son at pool then things must be bad!
It must be some additive that goes in the water in Sutton. The last few games with this lot have been full of 'dodgy perm' chants, which has its origins in the fact that one of their defenders has a shaggy dog haircut that has earned him the nickname of "poodle". Imagine our delight to discover that one of Sutton B's players had the self-same cut as well!
That was the only solstace to be earned from this tie. Enfield were well and truly hammered, and it didn't help matters to see Bubbles playing as a lone striker up front.
With Enfield now officially out of the competition, the entertainment switched to seeing our rivals bite the dust as well. Sutton A vs. Bishop's Stortford was a penalty shoot-out of real quality, and I think we must have ticked off the South London boys with our distractions behind the goal in an 8-7 sudden-death win, for as we returned to our seats they mentioned in passing that we were out and THEY were in the Wooden Spoon Semi-Final.
The best match I saw was Dulwich B vs. Hitchin A. semi for the main competition.The penalty shoot-out was a right laugh, for with ten kicks down and sudden-death, the score was only 1-1! Hitchin A finally came through on the next series of kicks. Great entertainment.
By 5pm the trek home began. Our victors were on, and boring they most certainly were. Who won the main tournament proper? Probably Dulwich Hamlet A., and as for the wooden spoon - who cares? For the sake of Clive and his Hitchin connection I hope it was the hosts that won the trophies. Here's to next year!
Matchday programme comments are by Clive
Lee Mills - Will need to be in better form than when they visited Hertford Town earlier this season and lost 0-8.
Paul Macdonald - Brother Mike is in the squad.
Brian Burbridge
Dave Farenden - his football career took a dive when he was rejected by Ware.
Danny Valverde
Chris Moore - assistant manager. Better known as "Shaggy".
Phil McMurdie - our midfield starlet.
Keith Knight - expected to run around a lot.
Mike Macdonald - won the Most Improved Player of The Year award for 1995/96.
Dave Bromage - matchday reporter. Involved with the matchday programme.
John Taverner - a qualified referee
Bubbles - last year he cropped up on Three Counties Radio who were at the tournament. Bubbles slagged off Stevenage Borough, the Conference, and everyone in general. Bubbles likes to eat 25 burgers in one go (according to Clive of course!!!)
